Lyrics
Close your eyes, open your mind
Your journey’s about to begin
Relax your karma and try not to barf
As the universe starts to spin
Hocus Pocus, Expialidocious
Set your aura free
Petrificus Totalus
Drink deeply from the chalice
Tell us what you see!
Ahahahaha!
: I see a door!
: Oi! What did I say? No-
: Go through it
: It’s opening on its own!
: That’s magic
: This is the day my father died
The king is dead, long live the king
The king is dead, long live the king
Where is his son, who’ll inherit everything?
: Is that you, sire? So handsome
: No. It’s my much older brother, Kingsley
: I can’t see anything!
: That’s me
: Shut up, you!
: I can’t see anything!
: Shut up!
: Oh, dear
: I ate my feelings. And a lot of bread
: The sword, Your Highness!
Here’s your royal sword!
: No one gives me anything
: To be the king, you must receive the sword!
: If I want something, I take it
And I don’t want to be any king
: Oh, but, Kingsley, it’s your destiny
We literally named you 'Kingsley'
God told us to!
It’s not like we were being trendy
My destiny lies beyond the castle walls, mother
I’m going to conquer and kill
And spread bastard children throughout the land, like wildflower seeds
Somebody else can sit on their ass and rule
But who? Who?
But who? Who?
But who?
(Young Richard farts, the Royal Court gasps)
: Dickie?
: Dickie? Ha!
: Brilliant. Gareth!
: Aye!
: You shall be the king’s guard
: I’m only ten, but alright
I’m Gareth, and I’ll faithfully serve you, My King
The sword, your highness
Here’s your royal sword
To be the king-
Actually, I think I will take the sword
Good luck, Dickie